Vegetable Porn

I am not having great success with my courgettes this year. I used to be able to turn out crop after crop of superb courgettes (zucchinis for friends over the pond) but this year they just get to a few inches and then disappoint. I feel the last part of that sentence has probably appeared in a lot of blogs but not to do with courgettes.

So I’ve been wondering about helping the male and female flowers along, much as you do when wanting marrows. This will effectively make me a courgette pimp. I feel slightly uneasy about partaking in what is little more than vegetable porn (enjoy that google searchers).

Here’s a picture (non-graphic, but if you click it gets bigger *titter*) of part of my courgette plant. Yes, it has black fly too so I’m partaking in dirty vegetable porn. I have no shame.

I also can’t help but giggle when I look at these houseleeks.

Elsewhere in the garden it is more serene and positively prudish. You can’t get more wholesome than an English rose and here is a photo of one of mine.

This is a photo (which I’m rather chuffed with if truth be known) of a new plant to my garden, a stargazer dahlia. It is thriving and so bright and pretty without being gaudy.

And the penstemons are in full bloom now. This plant was actually a competition win three years ago.

Also won from a competition, this year I got a twig through the post. It turned out to be a blackcurrant bush from Ribena. ‘Yeah right’ I thought, ‘Like that will grow into anything’. Well it has – in just a few months the twig has transformed into this:

Oh heck, let’s get back to the Carry On smut. Oh missus, look at what a lovely pear I’ve got!

Tech Tags: gardening, vegetables, fruit, gardens, courgette, zucchini, rose, penstemon, dahlia, houseleek, pear, Carry+On, blackcurrant, ribena,

Comments

[Stegbeetle]

Vegetable porn? Have you no shame?

Well the courgettes may not be doing well but it's good to see that other things are coming up under your hands (fnarr, fnarr)!

[rhonda]

Thank you for defining courgettes for those of us on the other side of the pond.

You've a green thumb! I am jealous. I think your garden looks fabulous.

[Alice Kirby]

Brilliant!

Plants, veggies and flowers are all about the sex.

Was just about to moan at you that you hadn't done a blog in ages... and here one is, lovely pictures and all!

[JonnyB]

Hope you're ready for some... unusual.. visitors arriving via Google...

[Ms. Mac]

I wonder if your blackcurrants will have little faces and sing to you.

I love Ribena!!

[Kate]

Vegetable porn - that reminds me of that Andrew Marvell poem, My Coy Mistress. It has a line that goes something like 'my vegetable love is growing' it had me in stitches when I first read it.

Your plants look great BTW - I have house leeks too! They are great little plants aren't they.

[St Jude]

Oh er missus. I love a good bit of carry on too.

[Attila the Mom]

Gorgeous pics!

I've always wanted to know (after reading Hercule Poirot)...

What in the hell is a marrow? Is it an interchangable term with courgette?

Thanks!

[Kate]

Attila the Mom - a marrow is an adult courgette. It looks the same, but bigger. I'm not sure what they are called in the US, maybe a squash, but maybe not.

[Attila the Mom]

Thanks Kate. They look like zucchinis. Unless you already have something called zucchinis. ;-)

[Marjory]

Tsk tsk... You should get out more...

(like I wasn't in stitches!)