Backwards In High Heels

No News Is Good News, But Odd News Is Better

Sometimes it is best to avoid the news. An endless stream of death and destruction can easily leave you overwhelmed, sometimes it is best just to look away for a while.

However, other days you put up the news sites on the internet and youth faith in human absurdity is fully restored within two or three clicks.

Today there are two such stories.

First North Carolina Pair Feud Over Leg. I’ve linked to the story but to summarise, Mr Wood had his leg amputated above the knee after a plane crash in 2004. Not wanting to be buried without his leg whenever he should hop off this mortal coil, Mr Wood kept his leg in a bbq smoker. The smoker was kept in a storage facility, Mr Wood falls behind on payments and his items are sold off as part of the dispute cue Mr Whisnant who finds himself the new owner of a smoker and a leg.

The leg was sent to the police, who concluded no foul play and passed it on to a funeral home until Mr Wood could collect. But by this time Mr Whisnant had a little trade of charging people to look in the empty smoker he asked for the leg back, as he says with hallowe’en around the corner he could charge more if the limb was there too. This all has a ring of a Simpson’s episode about it.

Mr Woods, the man who kept his leg in a smoker, is saying Mr Whisnant is making a freak show out of this and thus the two men are at loggerheads in a custody case.

I’m sure there’s a way to sledgehammer in a joke regarding Heather Mills McCartney…

And as if that wasn’t enough, cue next headline. Feuding Nuns Force Convent Demise. The last three remaining nuns in an Italian convent came to blows, thus forcing it shut. As a convent educated girl I’m not entirely shocked, you soon learn a cornered nun can be a vicious animal.

The Sound of Music would have been much with nuns like this, ‘Nuns Kneeing Nazis’ – I’d pay to see that.

Confessional

There was an article in today's newspaper about  Monsignor Georg Gaenswein, the Pope's Secretary.  The article was very serious detailing his recent comments on what he perceives as a threat of Islaminastion of Western Europe.

Now am I going to go into a long and well thought out discussion on this issue?

No, I was too busy looking at his picture

I think I am having a 'Thorn Birds' moment.

The Floods Are Divine Judgement

We have been sent the floods for a reason. The Almighty is casting down rain with good cause and I am grateful because...

only the floods have the power to knock the bloody Beckhams off the news channels.

Yes. All this water is judgement from above that He too is sick to the back teeth of every bulletin featuring whether or not Brand Beckham and their spawn have been shopping. I don't want to see the tacky twosome sprawled half naked across one another (though recreating the shots with a pipe cleaner and an action man is quite amusing)

So what if Pish has cellulite? - it's probably the closest thing she has a to a qualification.

I'm not heartless, I wish them no ill, I wish them a happy family life in America and I wish as much of it as possible to be behind closed doors.

That aside, hello folks!  I've been a bit neglectful of the blog the last week or so.

I am still in the strange bodyclock of writing at 2am. Not that this is a complaint as I am loving writing sketches for the new radio series. I don't know if any of them will cut the mustard but the enjoyment from writing them and then having a proper writer and producer to send feedback - well I feel a bit spoilt and extremely grateful though that can also tip into guilt.  I mean surely no-one should have fun doing something which can also be classed as work?

I have also developed a facebook addiction and been happily reunited with some old school chums having previously fallen into the mindless trap of the Christmas card round robin as passing for meaningful communication.  No, now communication of real meaning is back into those friendships as we can virtually throw lobsters at each other when we should be working.

One friend who it is great to be spending frivilous online time with is Vicki from my Convent schooldays.  Perhaps we will rival Mrs Beckham & Co for newslots as if the Spice Girls are reforming perhaps it is time for the mighty return of....Saintley.  Myself, Vicki, Laura and other Becky were part of the most successful* girlband of '87. We had two original songs and three chords which immediately makes us better than Westlife.

Ah yes, the lyrical genius of 'Lady Lucifer' is probably only matched by Lennon's 'Imagine'

* successful is a subjective measurement