Backwards In High Heels

LIfe: The Theme Park

Today I am blaming the steroid medication for my swinging moods. Life, at the moment is a roller-coaster (and please do not refer to that bloody awful Ronan Keating song). I can go from extremely merry to ready to burst into tears at the flick of switch, apparently for no good reason.

Yesterday was not the greatest of days for a myriad of reasons which I won't go into, suffice to say I went to bed weepy in a big bubble of poor me/I'm rubbish.

This morning something which was meat to cheer me up did so, but for all the wrong reasons.

So, I shall enjoy the sedates up and throw my hands in the air and scream for the downs. I may add further attractions to my steroid theme park later. So far I've avoided becoming the bearded lady, but am making a strong running for the fattest!

All that said I wouldn't say I'm depressed and on that subject there's a great article here on the BBC websiteby Mary Kenny, on whether we have forgotten what it is to be sad, lonely and grieving.

Now get in line if you want a go on the merry-go-round....

Interlude Over

Apologies for that blog interlude. A few weeks ago all the medical treatment and what not caught up with me. I realised I was being too stubborn for my own good and the 'I can carry on as normal' routine was not in my best interest! So I slowed right back, paced work and tried to relax. In doing so I discovered I have forgotten how to relax. I can't keep a chair warm to watch a TV programme, or heavens forbid, just sit. But, I have gotten in to the habit of having a nap when my body and/or mind points out it feels at breaking point. Some things, shock horror, are being left undone and can wait until another day.

I'm feeling more with it now, but still tremendously tired on top of the physical aches and pains. The next step is I will be scheduling the blogging back in because it is me time, and that's what has been sacrificed too much in the past to my own detriment.

Tomorrow I see the renal consultant again so hopefully will come away with the next step of treatment, which  I'm hoping will be less hard on the old body and more heading towards the longer term remission plan - fingers crossed!